Has the Media Made Our Expectations of Men Too High?

Shows like The Vampire Diaries and Gossip Girl have extremely attractive male cast members.  Seeing Ian Somerhalder on my screen every Thursday is enough to make me giggle like a blushing preteen. And we can’t forget the one and only Nate Archibald (A.K.A the reincarnation of Adonis).

But when I turn off the television, it’s back into the real world. I realize things are different. There aren’t Damons’ walking around waiting to charm me with their smile.
I’m not saying that everyone is bad looking, but I’ve become accustomed to seeing the almost FLAWLESS images flashing across my screen. And I admit that my reality is a bit blurred because of that.

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Let me explain that more.

I’ll use Damon for example. (Can you tell I really like his character?)
Starting with his physical appearance: the man is, well, beautiful. Amazing bone structure, beautiful eyes and a great body.
On the inside he is an emotionally damaged and distant soul. Which, somehow, makes the audience sympathize with him and want to give him a lingering hug. And possibly a kiss.

Though on the inside he is damaged,  all he wants is to be loved. He also has a strong desire to protect Elena. So what’s does that mean?  We start to search for someone like that, including having features that are “perfect.”

And in a perfectly imperfect world (which I appreciate) finding someone like Damon is impossible.

Amanda, a sophomore at Quinnipiac University, compared reality to the television world.

“I think the media does make our expectations too high. Especially in college when some guys thinks they can take advantage of a girl in a club when she’s drunk,” said Amanda.

“And when you watch movies like The Notebook where Noah is an overall sweet guy who falls in love with Ally, it’s like ‘wow, why can’t that happen to me?'”

But are all guys really like that?

Jane*, also a sophomore at Quinnipiac in college disagrees:

“There are genuinely nice guys out there. The media just makes it seems as if they are easy to find–nothing in life comes easy, not even love,” said Jane.

Sydney, a freshman, thinks a little differently.

“I don’t think so. When I think of the media, I don’t think of guys and my expectations for them. That’s just something you should have on your own,” said Sydney.

Participants in a study conducted said they blamed the media for reinforcing these unrealistic ideas of perfection.

So what can we do about that?
Well as long as there is a media, the reality of things will always be blurred. With the media, nothing appears as it seems.

As for me, I definitely need to stop expecting perfect guys, especially when I’m not perfect myself. And it is always best to find and appreciate the beauty in people–whether it be on the inside or out.

*Name was changed at the interviewee’s request. 

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3 thoughts on “Has the Media Made Our Expectations of Men Too High?

  1. amen! we always talk about the media’s unrealistic expectations for women and we forget that it’s no picnic for men, either. perfect people are boring, anyway 🙂

  2. Team Damon!!! Team Stefan!!!
    Of couse there are good guys out there, the problem is jerks are easier to find and outnumber the good ones.

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